Dating a Co-worker – Good or Bad?
In our days more and more people decide to start a relationship with a co-worker. The reason why this happens is that many young professional men and women are spending almost all their time at the office, so they have less time to go out and meet new people. So, it is natural to seek friendship and companionship from colleagues.
But for many times, this friendship transform into a relationship that in most of the cases fail. There are many risks that make this very difficult to maintain. But not many people know about this before they start a relationship. So, if you are a very busy man too and spend all your time in an office, and decided to date with a co-worker, you should take a closer look at all the potential benefits and disasters that could be associated with this new career move.
There are some aspects that you should take in consideration:
-Before you ask your co-worker for a possible date, check if your company has an employee disabled dating policy; the company may have strict rules about any relationship that forum between you two; also think about how much you are wiling to risk your career for this relationship from the beginning
-If you didn’t ask her for a date already, and don’t know how to do it, you may organize a group outing or event and invite her; but if she refuse, you have to think at something else; suggest something casual like dinner or movie
-Before ask her for a date, make sure that you know as much as you can about her; so develop an office relationship before you develop a romantic one
-You must think about what happens if your relationship doesn’t work; will you be able to handle the situation to see your co-worker every day, to interact her daily? It may be very difficult to re-establish a professional demeanor with a person
-At final one of you have to leave this job because thing’s don’t work out or because it’s against the company policy to date fellow employees
-Or worst, you don’t know what your partner is capable to do if things don’t work between you two, it may be ruining your career
-Dating a co-worker can affect your work, if you are unable to differentiate between work and pleasure; so agree to not flirt at work, you have to set up relationship rules for the workplace
-Avoid signs of affection in public such as hand holding, kisses, flirting; you’d better meet off-site for lunch or after program hours
-It is true that you have a lot in common, that you will go with pleasure every morning at the office anxious to see her, and it is a person with who you will always have what to speak about;
-You have someone to confide in concerning your work problems; she may be a great help; but, there are more negatives aspects about this kinds of relationships
-Remember that you have to maintain a professional image, so don’t let your relationship affect your performance; if your romance is affecting your work, you may be asked to end your relationship or to find another job
-A relationship like this can create problems in your promotion; the boss may see that you are more preoccupied by your partner than your work
-Develop open communication, if you are disabled dating with a co-worker think about the fact that you have to have two different types of relationships, business and romantic, with the same person;
-Never date with a subordinate because you may be accused for favoritism by the others employers; the others co-workers will exclude you now from certain conversations, will not discuss anymore with you about privacy
-If you spend more and more time with her during the office hours, the more and more you will distance yourself from your associates, those you’ve developed personal relationships with;
-If you start a relationship with a co-worker it is better to keep it secret; it will need a lot of discretion, energy and effort to keep your office romance just between you two; so don’t tell your colleagues about your romance because your both work will be definitely affected
-Also avoid sending electronic love messages or letters because some companies prohibit the use of company e-mails system for personal use, others reserves the right to access or disclose electronic messages or files of an employee
-As a benefit, you get to have lunch together; so from a usual boring office lunch, you can have part of one full of flirting
As you see there are some benefits but most of them are downsides. I suggest you to think very well if you really want to get into a relationship that may affect your career and if you are ready to do this. As I said, it may be very difficult to make it work. But, it remains at your choice what you are going to do.
Image by Joe Shlabotnik
Above a parking lot in Jacksonville Beach, Florida.
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